People are always meeting others with hopes of starting relationships somewhere down the line. These relationships can vary from friendships to serious dating relationships. The question is what is it that each person wants and are their desires and intentions known to the other person.
I have a friend who recently got disappointed due to the lack of communication between her and a guy. They had been talking for some time, but they never really understood what they were or what was going on between them.
In the beginning stages no one wants to rush into anything so they may say something along the lines of "I don't want to be in a relationship right now". Well that right now doesn't mean that their mind wont change later. After a long period of time of hanging out and talking to each other, this guy pretty much met someone who seems to be of great importance. This is the problem, they didn't discuss their intentions more than once. Just because someone is not ready when you meet don't mean that they wont be after you hang out and get to know each other better.
Another situation that someone I know has come across is that they are interested in someone and from what they could tell that person also seemed to be very interested in them. But things seem to be backing off. Everything was all good in the beginning but like the previous situation it seems to be taking a turn. Now the question is up in the air on where they are going or if either one of them are actually considering being in a relationship.
It is important that we communicate with those that we have an increasing or decreasing interest in. If you have a change of heart let the person know so that if someone else does come into the picture, you wont get your feelings hurt and wonder what could have been had you actually opened up your mouth and told them how you feel.
I know that this blog probably isn't as intense as previous blogs but I feel that it is of great importance. I know that no one likes to get hurt, so keep a line of open communication. Its better to tell someone how you feel sooner than later. Especially when you are the one having a change of heart. Yeah it can hurt them at the moment depending on how they feel but if you told them you want to try to be with them then you change your mind to keeping them in the friend zone, even if you just have to drop a hint, let it be known. If you told them that you two were just friends but you catch yourself catching feelings then yeah its possible that you can end up being that one that is hurt but who is to say that this person didn't have a change of heart and may possibly feel the same way. You never know so let your intentions be known.
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Dog I dont care...Do with her as you please
It has been brought to my attention that there are some "True Dogs" out there. I don't mean dog in a nice way. I am not talking about the nasty Que dogs, or your average fuck around dog. I'm talking about the I will fuck you and pass you along to my friends type of dog. The I don't care what happens to you type of dog. Those my sistas are the ones we, as women with one of the highest STD statistics, need to watch out for.
These guys come to us and pull us in with their so called "charm". Then they go into the "I like you, but don't want to be with you". Some do tell you before you give yourself to them and some do it afterward. You know your worth, and when you are living in the fast lane, believe me...you don't care. After you get pulled in and he is telling you all these things about how much he likes you and wants to see you, you really think that he means it and you being the naive girl who actually believes and falls for this "dogs" game, gives yourself to him. Not only are you disappointed or happy depending on how good or bad his sex game is, but you fail to realize that is the moment that he believes he has you and could care less about anything else because he has gotten what he wants.
You already knew that he didn't want the relationship, but you give yourself to him. Then you close off your heart to the point where you no longer like him, but you keep doing it because you like sex and possibly figured out how to get yours when it comes to him. Not to mention there are some guys out there who do the same old boring position that you may not even like. But yet, you still continue to lower yourself for this "dog".
Let me tell you about something a "dog" has done to not me, but a few girls that i know. He has pulled them in, Got them to like him, Fucked them (some liked and some didnt), he has blew them off, and also told his friends if, "if you want to hit go ahead i dont care bout that girl". Yes, he did, they have, and there are more like them out there.
Ladies, what are we doing? We are lowering our standards because we are giving up on the fact that there are some good guys out there. We just do what we think and believe that we need to do just to get by. We need to realize we are worth so much more than these "dogs" are trying to make us seem. Think about it this way, before you even give a real dog a treat first you have to buy it, then he has to do a trick. We are feeding these "dogs" without even waiting for them to do something "special". Watch out for the dogs willing to take a bite out of your coochie, and you are sitting there with nothing to return.
These guys come to us and pull us in with their so called "charm". Then they go into the "I like you, but don't want to be with you". Some do tell you before you give yourself to them and some do it afterward. You know your worth, and when you are living in the fast lane, believe me...you don't care. After you get pulled in and he is telling you all these things about how much he likes you and wants to see you, you really think that he means it and you being the naive girl who actually believes and falls for this "dogs" game, gives yourself to him. Not only are you disappointed or happy depending on how good or bad his sex game is, but you fail to realize that is the moment that he believes he has you and could care less about anything else because he has gotten what he wants.
You already knew that he didn't want the relationship, but you give yourself to him. Then you close off your heart to the point where you no longer like him, but you keep doing it because you like sex and possibly figured out how to get yours when it comes to him. Not to mention there are some guys out there who do the same old boring position that you may not even like. But yet, you still continue to lower yourself for this "dog".
Let me tell you about something a "dog" has done to not me, but a few girls that i know. He has pulled them in, Got them to like him, Fucked them (some liked and some didnt), he has blew them off, and also told his friends if, "if you want to hit go ahead i dont care bout that girl". Yes, he did, they have, and there are more like them out there.
Ladies, what are we doing? We are lowering our standards because we are giving up on the fact that there are some good guys out there. We just do what we think and believe that we need to do just to get by. We need to realize we are worth so much more than these "dogs" are trying to make us seem. Think about it this way, before you even give a real dog a treat first you have to buy it, then he has to do a trick. We are feeding these "dogs" without even waiting for them to do something "special". Watch out for the dogs willing to take a bite out of your coochie, and you are sitting there with nothing to return.
Sunday, March 7, 2010
The X-Factor....When Exs get in the Mix
So i have these two people I know, and well there has been some drama in their relationship due to the Ex. Now, the ex for those of you who are dumb when it comes to relationships is the last person u dated.
I have tried to keep both of my exs in my life and i must say that life is better without all of the conversations and connections. Its easier to move on without an ex. I can focus more on me and others, instead of them. But that is just as a single person. How about those who are in relationships?
Sometimes we tend to want to keep these people in our lives, but I think what we fail to look at is why? What makes these people so important that we can't seem to let go of them? Why is it that we call them, text them, message them, or find excuses to be friends with them?
Then you have to think about this. Are you in a relationship now? If you are then it must be known that drama will be a big part of your life if you are still talking to your ex while talking to your boo. Boos do not like exs point blank period. Knowing that you used to be this persons that you continue to talk to and hang around can and will make them jealous. Thoughts will enter their minds making them wonder what does that person have that I don't have? What are they doing for them that I am not? Why would they want to be with them instead of me. There are so many things that would just cause problems. And if your boo doesn't like your ex and you continue to talk to them then not only are you slapping them in the face by saying that their feelings don't care, but you are also showing a type of selfishness that can and will hurt your boo and possibly cause your relationship to fail.
People like to feel appreciated and with being in a relationship and feeling appreciated comes sacrifices. If you have to lie to keep your ex in your life then you really need to think about if you should be in this relationship. You need to think about if this ex is worth it. Why do you need them when you have that special someone already?
People are going to be jealous. Its a part of life. They will get jealous when they feel that someone else has what they want and they cant get it.
When exs get in the mix there is drama. If your boo is dramatic there is drama. So put ex + drama queen together = problems. Just think about your actions and whether or not someone should be in your life or not.
If you are going to conversate with your ex then you need to make sure that your boo is getting more of you than your ex ever will, and your ex is just going to have to respect that because they had their turn, unless you were the total screw up, then it looks like you are trying to keep them to prove your worthiness. And most of all, don't lie about it. The moment you lie is the moment that you lose all your credibility and trust.
I have tried to keep both of my exs in my life and i must say that life is better without all of the conversations and connections. Its easier to move on without an ex. I can focus more on me and others, instead of them. But that is just as a single person. How about those who are in relationships?
Sometimes we tend to want to keep these people in our lives, but I think what we fail to look at is why? What makes these people so important that we can't seem to let go of them? Why is it that we call them, text them, message them, or find excuses to be friends with them?
Then you have to think about this. Are you in a relationship now? If you are then it must be known that drama will be a big part of your life if you are still talking to your ex while talking to your boo. Boos do not like exs point blank period. Knowing that you used to be this persons that you continue to talk to and hang around can and will make them jealous. Thoughts will enter their minds making them wonder what does that person have that I don't have? What are they doing for them that I am not? Why would they want to be with them instead of me. There are so many things that would just cause problems. And if your boo doesn't like your ex and you continue to talk to them then not only are you slapping them in the face by saying that their feelings don't care, but you are also showing a type of selfishness that can and will hurt your boo and possibly cause your relationship to fail.
People like to feel appreciated and with being in a relationship and feeling appreciated comes sacrifices. If you have to lie to keep your ex in your life then you really need to think about if you should be in this relationship. You need to think about if this ex is worth it. Why do you need them when you have that special someone already?
People are going to be jealous. Its a part of life. They will get jealous when they feel that someone else has what they want and they cant get it.
When exs get in the mix there is drama. If your boo is dramatic there is drama. So put ex + drama queen together = problems. Just think about your actions and whether or not someone should be in your life or not.
If you are going to conversate with your ex then you need to make sure that your boo is getting more of you than your ex ever will, and your ex is just going to have to respect that because they had their turn, unless you were the total screw up, then it looks like you are trying to keep them to prove your worthiness. And most of all, don't lie about it. The moment you lie is the moment that you lose all your credibility and trust.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
